Discipline or Dysregulation? Rethinking Why We Resist Exercise
Resistance to exercise isn’t a character flaw.
It’s a signal.
A part of you — or your whole system — may be saying:
“I’m not ready for more demand right now.”
In polyvagal theory, the nervous system moves through different states:
Regulated (ventral vagal): grounded, connected
Mobilized (sympathetic): ready for action
Shut down (dorsal vagal): heavy, disconnected, frozen
That frozen feeling — foggy, flat, hard to start — is your body’s protective response.
It’s conserving energy, not being lazy.
How This Shows Up in Real Life
If you’re in a freeze or shutdown state, you might notice:
You wake up tired, even after sleeping
The thought of working out feels overwhelming
You plan to move, then avoid it
You start fast, then crash and feel worse
You constantly compare yourself to who you used to be
In Somatic Experiencing, we track where resistance shows up in your body.
In IFS (Internal Family Systems), we meet the parts of you that want movement — and the ones that are scared or exhausted.
These aren’t just thoughts.
They’re physiological states that shape your energy, motivation, and capacity.
This Is Not a Lack of Willpower
We live in a culture that worships hustle.
“Push through.” “No excuses.” “Just do it.
But when your system is frozen, pushing doesn’t help.
It increases internal pressure and deepens shutdown.
From a window of tolerance perspective, you’re outside your capacity zone.
Movement feels unsafe or impossible — not because you’re inconsistent, but because your system is protecting you from overload.
Shaming yourself won’t regulate you.
It will push you further out of reach.
You Don’t Need More Motivation. You Need Restoration
At Tidal Trauma Centre and through our Repattern retreats in Abbotsford, we start with this truth:
Your system is doing its best to protect you.
Instead of asking, “Why can’t you commit?”, we ask:
What is your system trying to protect you from?
Can we create a bridge between your frozen state and gentle movement?
What kind of movement feels like a “maybe” or even a small “yes” today?
Our goal is to help people reconnect with movement that actually supports their nervous system, and their goals.,
Why You Dread Moving — But Feel Better Once You Start
This is such a common experience.
You dread getting started…
Then five minutes in, you feel better.
Why?
Because movement — approached with internal consent — can shift your nervous system from freeze into regulated mobilization.
It’s a state change.
But your system can’t predict that shift until you begin.
And it must begin small enough that it doesn’t feel like a threat.
The dread is real.
But it’s not the whole story.
If this resonates, you might want to read further: Why You Dread Exercise But Feel Better Once You Start: A Nervous System Lens
What Nervous-System-Informed Movement Looks Like
Let’s reimagine our relationship to movement. Try:
Interoception first: Notice breath, tension, posture
Micro-movements: One stretch. One step. One breath.
Let protectors speak: Journal, draw, or move in new ways
Redefine movement: Gardening, walking your dog, dancing in your kitchen
Use regulation cues: Music, breath, sunlight, scent
You don’t need to “snap out of it.”
You need to coax your system back into motion with care and pacing.
And when your system feels more resourced — when you’re regulated enough to try something more — you might find that more dynamic movement becomes available too. That could look like a brisk walk, strength training, or a class you once enjoyed. The key is that it emerges from capacity, not pressure.
Start where you are.
Let your movement match your state — not your shoulds.
We’ve Seen This Across Surrey, Langley, and Vancouver
Clients from across the Lower Mainland come into sessions convinced they’re failing.
But when we name what’s actually happening — freeze, collapse, protectors doing their job — the pressure lifts.
They stop fighting themselves.
They start listening.
And that’s when movement becomes possible again.
At our Repattern retreats, we see this shift often.
People arrive feeling frozen, stuck and discouraged.
They leave feeling present, empowered and aligned.
Ready to Explore Your Relationship to Exercise?
Contact us or fill out a New Client Form to be matched with one of our therapists who uses parts work or somatic therapies.
If you’re ready, book a free consult or appointment here: 👉 Book Now
Or check our Repattern Embodied Wellness Retreats in Abbotsford, BC.
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Discipline involves choosing to act in alignment with your values. Dysregulation is a physiological barrier that limits access to those choices. If your system is in freeze, all the discipline in the world may not be enough to override it. The key is to notice whether your resistance feels protective and automatic, rather than avoidant or defiant. That’s usually a clue that you need restoration before action.
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This is a common nervous system response called anticipatory resistance. Your brain predicts how something will feel based on past experiences — not current facts. If movement has ever felt overwhelming, punishing, or exhausting, your system may associate it with threat. Even if it could help, your body might instinctively say “no” before you start. That resistance isn’t irrational. It’s protective patterning.
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Yes — movement can be incredibly supportive for mood, stress, and overall mental health. But how and when we move matters. If your nervous system is in a state of freeze or collapse, high-intensity workouts or rigid routines can actually increase overwhelm or reinforce shutdown. Gentle, titrated movement creates a safer on-ramp. It helps your system shift without triggering alarm.That said, there may be times when more vigorous exercise feels accessible and even energizing. The key is to track your state. Start with what’s available to you today — without pressure to “push through.” The right kind of movement meets your system where it is.
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Related Blogs:
Why You Dread Exercise But Feel Better Once You Start: A Nervous System Lens
Regulating the Nervous System: Tools for Stress, Burnout, and Overwhelm
How Trauma Affects the Nervous System (and What Therapy Can Do)
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