Healing After a Hard Childhood: How Trauma Therapy Helps with ACEs

Understanding Adverse Childhood Experiences

Not every child grows up feeling safe, seen, or supported. For many, childhood includes experiences that are confusing, overwhelming, or deeply painful. These are known as Adverse Childhood Experiences, or ACEs.

ACEs include things like emotional neglect, physical abuse, witnessing violence in the home, losing a parent to addiction or incarceration, or growing up in an environment that lacked stability and safety. These experiences don’t just impact your childhood. They shape your nervous system, your sense of self, and your ability to feel safe in the world.

The original ACEs study, conducted by the CDC and Kaiser Permanente, showed that these early experiences are more common than we think and that they can lead to long-term challenges with physical and mental health. But the research also shows something else: the presence of safe, supportive relationships and trauma-informed care can help create meaningful recovery.

Long-Term Impacts of ACEs on Body and Mind

You may not have connected some of your current struggles to your early experiences. That’s understandable. ACEs often live in the nervous system, not just the memory. The impacts can show up as:

  • Emotional dysregulation or frequent overwhelm

  • Chronic fatigue or unexplained physical tension

  • Anxiety, depression, or a deep sense of shame

  • Difficulty trusting others or forming close relationships

  • Trouble setting boundaries or knowing what you need

  • Feeling stuck, numb, or disconnected from yourself

These patterns are not personality flaws. They are adaptations. Your body and mind learned how to survive. With the right care, they can also learn how to feel safe again.

What Trauma Therapy Offers

Trauma-informed therapy helps you process the effects of ACEs without re-traumatizing you. At Tidal Trauma Centre, we offer a variety of approaches tailored to your needs and pace:

  • EMDR Therapy helps process and re-pattern distressing memories through bilateral stimulation, making past experiences feel less charged in the present.

  • Internal Family Systems (IFS) helps you understand and connect with the different protective parts of yourself, including those that may feel stuck in old survival roles.

  • Somatic Therapy which supports nervous system regulation through body-based awareness and techniques. This helps with feeling grounded and safe in your own body.

  • Emotion-Focused and Attachment-Based Therapies which can build emotional resilience and help you form more secure internal and external relationships, especially if early caregiving was unpredictable or painful.


Why Counselling Matters for ACEs

While trauma therapy focuses on the nervous system and body-mind connection, counselling helps you explore how your past continues to affect your emotions, relationships, and self-worth today.

Counselling can support you to:

  • Recognize patterns rooted in early survival strategies

  • Build a deeper, more compassionate relationship with yourself

  • Explore how your past is shaping your present in ways you can shift

  • Develop tools to create boundaries, calm anxiety, and foster self-trust

  • Reconnect with the parts of you that are still hoping for repair

You do not need to carry the effects of your childhood forever. Healing is possible, even if the hurt happened a long time ago.


Common Myths About Healing from ACEs

  • You don’t need full memories for trauma therapy to help. The nervous system remembers what the mind doesn’t. Therapy works with what is present now, your emotions, patterns, and physical responses.

  • What matters is not just what happened, but how it impacted your sense of safety and support. Small repeated hurts can have just as much impact as single major events.

  • There is no timeline for healing. If something from your past is still affecting how you feel, relate, or cope today, it matters. Therapy is about working with what’s still alive in your system.

What to Expect in a Session

Each therapist at Tidal tailors their approach to your needs. Sessions may include:

  • Talking through present-day challenges

  • Exploring how past experiences show up in your current nervous system

  • Using tools like EMDR or somatic techniques when appropriate

  • Practicing regulation skills, boundaries, or self-connection

  • Moving at a pace that feels manageable and respectful

We offer therapy online throughout BC and in person at our Cloverdale office.

You Are Not Alone, and You Are Not Too Late

If you grew up in an environment that felt unsafe, chaotic, or neglectful, you deserve support.
What happened was not your fault. What happens next is your choice.

Fill out a New Client Form to get matched with one or moreof our trauma-informed counsellors. If you’re ready, book a free consult or appointment to begin the next part of your story.

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Disclaimer: The content on this website is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical, psychological, or mental health advice. It is not a substitute for professional care. Always consult a qualified healthcare provider for diagnosis and treatment.
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